There are moments in my life when I feel so unsure of the future. There’s a paralyzing feeling that always comes with it. And it’s what I hate the most. The feeling of floating on thin air, unsure, not in control. It’s funny because just a couple of days ago, God gave me another marker in my journey of finding my role in His Kingdom purpose. Maybe it’s always like this, that when you say yes to God, there’s always a crisis of belief that follows.
It’s days like this when I am suddenly confronted with what I have. And what I have is barely making it there at best and mostly unorganized and clumsy. I look at myself and ask, “Do I really have a place in this vast army of Christ’s workers?”
I then go to His words and this is what I read:
“It is not by force nor by strength, but by my Spirit… Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin…” (Zechariah 4:6,10)
The Lord rejoices, at this small beginnings. It’s amazing how God meets me where I exactly am. He reaches out so I won’t spiral down in a train of doubts and negative thoughts. He gives just enough light for me to continue on the road He has chosen for me.